Bloco da Bianca - Ano VII

 

Miss B  is  7! Almost a big kid! (oh no!)

She continues to be the sweet kid she has always been. That sweet kid that gives flowers to her piano teacher, mom and dad, write notes to her loved ones and makes drawings with hearts, flowers, butterflies and rainbows.

It is funny because she has this very sweet and girly side that loves to play dress  up and likes to wear pink and many accessories. Then she has a total tomboy side. She loves the Mutant Ninja Turtles. She loves playing with the boys, she can outrun most of the ones her age. Finally, climbing trees and being active are her favorite things. 

It was after her sixth birthday when Chase (a little BF from school - seen above) taught her how to tie her first shoe laces in Kindergarten.

She gave her first speech during ther Kindergarten graduation and made everyone laugh at her long and elaborated thank you speech.

She tried out and started swimming competitively. She earned many first places, shed tears when did not get first place. She has revealed to be an athlete that is cool, confident, that won't give up  but that does not like to lose.

She likes all sports and wants to try everything. At one point she was doing soccer, was in the swimming team and was at the pre-team at Gymnastics. And even considered doing karate and basketball!!!

At school, 1st grade has taught her so much and emotionally she grew leaps and bounds.

She loves Math and is very good at it. Before getting to 1st Grade she already knew the basics of multiplication on her own.  She is able to read first chapter books (a big deal for her!) and writes very creative stories.

She is confident, persistent and a truth teller like her daddy. Like her mom , she's  caring and much of a people pleaser. Also like her mom, she loves to play host and to make others feel better. She is very clumsy, extremly forgetful and as a result loses everytLhing, her mom's daughter! She is competitive and determined like us.

Some of her fave things:

Fave color:  " Rainbow"
Fave food/drink:  Definitely a picky eater! But has her passions... Meatloaf, Spaguetti & Meatballs, Taco, Sushi, crackers, cucumber, crackers, quiche, pineapple,  watermelon and loves milk, coconut water and passion fruit juice.
Fave Cartoon:  Mutant Ninja Turtles (Leo is her favorite Ninja), Wordgirl
BFFs:  Emily, Mady, Ava & Emily
Fave Toy:  Anything Mutant Ninja Turtles, Charlie (her teddy bear), Legos.
Fave hobbies:  Watch TV,   play Subway surfer in my Kindle, sing, go to the movies, play soccer, run, go swimming, go out for dinner and have playdates. 
Fave Song:  Princess Sofia's songs, Amazing (by Bruno Mars), Trouble (Taylor Swift), Party in the USA (Miley Cirus) and Firework (Katy Perry)
What she wants to be when she grows up: "A Scientist"
Not a big fan of:  sleeping early, taking a shower, tomato, pasta, chocolate or brownies, be laughed at it or losing.

Her BFF Mady

With her BFF Emily

In many aspects, even though I hate the weight of this statement, I have to say:  she is the kid I wish I had been! Extrovert, bubbly, fearless, confident and a natural leader. A great girl I get inspired by day by day. So very lucky and grateful to have been chosen  to be her Mommy and to shepherd her journey through life!

Big Lessons from Little People

I am not ashamed to come forward and say 'mea culpa' when indeed it is mine, which I recognize it is not very often (haha). However, mea culpa alone is not enough. Sometimes, just admitting you are wrong does not necessarily translate into action or correction. Sometimes, you have to be taught a lesson twice so it reminds you not to fall within the same old pattern of bad behaviour. And I had a reminder this past week. This is not about Miss B's behaviour, but my own.

B loves sports and she has chosen to  take on 3 sports, while I actually discouraged her to do so. But being the only child she is, having great grades at school and not a lot of homework, I felt it was ok for this season to take on 3. She went on with Swimming team  (4x a week), Soccer ( 2x a week) and Gymnastics (1 x a week) and she even wanted to take a fourth: Running, which I didn't let her.

She started the year strong but towards the end of the Summer she started not wanting to go to swimming as often and really not focusing during practice. The coach spoke to her and I spoke to her and asked if she wanted to continue swimming.  If indeed she liked swimming herself or was doing only to please me. She said she liked it, but it was a lot of work. Which in fact it is! The team approach seems to discourage those do not want to make swimming their #1 priority. As a result of our conversation, our compromise was to swim twice a week only until the November meet and then rethink whether she still wanted to swim when it was not so cold in February or March.

She started to focus a lot more and swam strong after that. I was thinking to myself that she was going to end her season with a win streak in the U6 category meet at the end of November. When I saw the Swim roster it became even more apparent that she would win it all, after all, she had the best times! What a beautiful ending to her first season of swimming would that be! Only that it did not end up the way I imagined...

Swimmers have good days and bad days and she had never had a bad so far. Well, the last meet was one of these "bad days". She improved her time in only 1 of the 4 styles she swam and, as a result she got second place in 3 styles and was even disqualified in the fly (which all swimmers but one were too, strangely).

You may be thinking,  isn't second place good when you're swimming against 10 other swimmers? I'd say  generally yes, but in knowing what she could have done and that in certain styles 5 year olds beat her, it was for me upsetting, disappointing and at the same time humbling.  I never let it transpire to her I was disappointed.  She wanted to know why she was disqualified, not even I knew. But overall, she was not super happy, but was not too upset. After all, she got medals! As for me,  I felt ashamed of underestimating other  kids so badly that I didn't want to confess my sin till now.

Even after this little lesson, I went on to sort of falling in to the same pattern of  bad behaviour this past week. We had practice, we had this kid that got kicked out of practice by the coach while his mom was not at practice. None of the moms really understood and the kid kept crying in the corner. I did not feel like going to talk to him because I did not want to take the authority from the coach. I did see him giving the kid a warning regarding behaviour so I assumed it was deserved. I felt really bad regardless, but yet didn't do anything about it.

After practice I asked B if she knew what had happened to the boy and she said she wasn't sure. She knew he was upset because the other boys were making up rhymes with his name. I felt even worse. He was being bullied and nobody actually did anything.

Saturday comes and we have a tough a game against an opponent that has mostly 7 and 8 year boys against our young team of 6-year old boys and girls. We were already losing 3-0 when the coach sets up the team with this boy that got kicked out,  two girls and another average player agains the all boys team. In my mind, it was the weakest team  of all, even if my daughter was in it and I told the other mom, that the coach should balance the team better, not having all girls at the same time etc. Right when I was saying that the little boy, the one that got kicked out,  started to make his odd moves and I say to the other mom: " you see what I'm saying, look at that!" This was a horrible, horrible comment from a mean mom. And that was me... Just in the heat of competition. Very mean indeed.

Right after realizing what I had said and thought, I immediately felt awful. This kind of behaviour would be something I expected from another mom I so criticize  for overpraising her kid and thinking every other kid is a moron. This is not me! Or is it?!

Well, we ended up losing to the big boys team, which was not the lesson in itself. The big lesson came from the little boy who got bullied and got kicked out during practice, who was making the odd moves during the game. He, the little boy, was the only one in our team to score a goal right towards the end of the game. His first goal.That right there, was a slap to my face. Wake and up and smell the coffeee. It's great to compete and to see your kid win, but do not ever understimate other kids or let competition  blind you and misguide you from your values. We are all created equal.

The "Who to Marry" Experiment

I  came across the following post on Facebook and found it so adorable that decided to replicate the same interview with Miss B. 

http://dailynewsdig.com/how-do-you-decide-who-to-marry-written-by-kids/

I did not rehearse the questions and just told her that there was no right or wrong answer. The result clearly indicates what I already knew: that she is a born romantic. 

It was actually surprising how well she answered the questions! I guess I was expecting some wilder answers based upon what I read. Instead, her answers were very direct and logical. 

My favorite parts were her answer to the question on what would she do if her date went wrong  (more power to her!) and also how you know who to marry. Two sides of my kid that is a helplessly romantic but also resilient and self-assured! 

Here's her full interview: 

http://youtu.be/kTAfZdBGHlA

The Underdog Rules Sometimes

Miss B has been playing soccer now since she’s 3 years old. Because I see that soccer is her favorite sport (yes,  she has the Brazilian DNA), I thought it was time to move to a new league in which she could practice and not only play for fun. We chose Tampa Bay Football Club as it is a club too.

 

She was supposed to start the new league and have a friend in her team. She and Mady were going to be together in the same team. However, when we found out that our team had 12 kids and only 4 would play I asked her whether she would prefer to be with her Imagine friends and play little soccer or move to another team with no Imagine friends and have more play time. She opted for the later. So she and Mady moved to different teams.

 

In the first practice with the new team, it was apparent that her team with more boys than girls  was much stronger than the past league. Last practice that became evident and Miss B suffered as she was not able to keep up with the boys, who incredibly seem to be born to play soccer. Even the girls were better than her. She was so frustrated when she could not get it right and cried alone out of frustration. My heart was broken but she had to realize she cannot be the best all the time and that she has to work hard. The positive side was that she didn’t come to cry on my lap, she came to me only during the break to tell me sobbing: “ it’s not fair, the boys are showing off!” . I explained to her that the boys were not showing off and that they were better because they had been in the league before while it was her first time practicing.  She left the practice feeling defeated.

 

Saturday comes along and as I arrive at the field for the game, I already feel that the environment resembles more a game than a recreational league especially if compared to her last league. There’s a bench for the players. The parents stay on the opposite side of the field. The coach is not allowed to get into the field and the players need to figure out where they should stay. Miss B was starting the game and I thought to myself, because they don’t want her at the last minute since she is not that good if compared to the others…

 

After ten minutes playing she leaves back to the bench and I felt like going to the other side to stay with her but I see no parents, so I stay on the parents side, but feeling really bad. I wanted to comfort, she’ my little girl!!!!

 

She gets into the game again when the other team had 1 goal lead. To everyone’s surprise she actually goes out there and scores a goal and tied the game! We were over the moon! So happy for her. After the half-time break she comes back in and she scores two more goals, but only one was valid. Her team ended up winning 2-1 with two goals by Miss B!!!! I could not believe, the underdog rules!!!! The coach named her MVP of the game with her two goals. I know she always excels when  it’s  competition day, just like what happens in swimming. But not in my wildest dreams I would think she would be the sole responsible for her team’s victory! That was my lesson for underestimating her and a divine providence. The victory with her two goals boosted her confidence and brought back the joy of playing soccer. Yesterday, it was a practice day and what I saw was a total different kid. Confidence and happy as she’s ever been.

Life is good again for Miss B!

 

Miss B for President!

Miss B had an assigment to present last week in celebration of President's Day. The teacher had asked the students to dress up like the president and share with the class few facts about their president of choice.

Without even forcing any agenda, I asked B if she knew which president she was going to speak about. Without any doubt in her voice she said: "I'm going to speak about President Obama". When I questioned why she had chosen him she said that he was a good president.

She further informed me she did not want to dress as a boy.  I told her to then dress like a  female President, to which she asked me: "Can girls be president?" I explained that of course we could and that in fact Brasil had a girl president. She then goes on and asks me: "Is she a fairy too?" I laughed so hard about the innocence of the question itself  but mostly because Dilma Husseff is no fairy! Much closer to a witch, I'd say, frankly... I contained myself and just told her: "No, not even close!". My fellow Brazilian friends will agree with me.

I almost told her she should dress like Hillary Clinton, our future first female president but I don't think the teacher would appreciate and I did not want to jinx it either!

Couple days later, I sat down with her by the computer to start researching and showed her how to Google. In the midst of my researches she jumps and says: "I'm going to grab some papers to take notes, because Scientist do takes notes and I am a kid Scientist, right, Mommy?"

When she returned she wrote down that the facts and was ready to present.

The day of the presentation arrived. She of course had no problem in presenting and when the teacher asked who she was dressed like, she said she was dressed like the first lady, Obama's wife! She said the teacher laughed and said she was funny.

That's my girl!

Of Love and Little Girls - An Update

Back in April last year I wrote about Miss B's "love" adventures. She has been very girly since then and is always hanging out with the girls. She has continued to be  the social butterfly she is.  For example, when we go to school events (like the McDonald's night) girls and boys come to say hi to her and she hugs everyone. But in all this time since Primrose she has not been talking about any boy in particular.

More recently, however, that changed. She again became infantuated with a boy from her school that she's known since Kindergarten and is now in her class.

The first or second week of school she came to me and said: "Mommy, when I grow up I  want to marry Chase". When I asked her why, she answered with an unusually shy tone, almost blushing: "because I really like him" . Then I asked her what it was about him that made her like him so much. She said that he was nice with her and that back in Kindergarten he had helped her to tie her shoe laces when she at the time did not know how to tie  them and had taught her as well how to tie them. A six-year old boy that stops to help  a girl to tie her shoes, what a rare species and a gentleman he is! Even I was in love with him! Little did I know that I knew his mom well and that he was a cutie, all in all, a substantial upgrade from some of  her pre-school crushes!

Just this weekend I found out that it is likely that Chase's family will move to Clearwater and, therefore, he will need to leave school. I casually mentioned to Miss B  last night. I did not expect such a reaction! She began sobbing loudly, very sad and kept saying: "I'm never going to see Chase again". "He's my best friend ever!" I tried  in vain to comfort her  so ended up saying that maybe I was wrong and he was not moving after all, since she had gotten so upset!

No doubt she is a drama queen, but I thought it was heartfelt, poor thing!  If  things haven't changed for her since pre-school,  this infatuation won't last long and soon enough another one will come. Neeeeext!

Claudia's Cause

I learned about Claudia and began following her page through a Facebook friend in the UK.

I am not exactly the person who distributes likes about every single sick or missing child.I do not like to see movies or stories about sick children or any tragedies with children at all. When it comes to Miss B, my world is pink and I am in denial about anything that is bad and that could afflict Miss B.

In all sincerity, I do not know how I became a follower of the Claudia's Cause, as it is a heartbreaking story about a a mom and her journeywith her 7-year old little girl who fights terminal cancer and whose birthday is one day before my Miss B's.

Although the story is sad and makes us feel powerless, the posts of this mom are awe-inspiring. She talks about chemo, cancer, tumors as if they are natural and the strenghth she has to fight hospitals, doctors, to mobilize the community for fundraising activities and to make her little girl's dreams come true is unreal. She is very positive in her tireless journey for a miracle for her dautghter and Claudia herself is a living miracle. A fighter,  that in spite of  this gruesome disease  always has bright smile on her face.

While I inevitably become emotional every time I read the postings, I also feed from her strenghth and faith. I rejoice with every little victory Claudia has battling cancer and thank God for I am so fortunate to have a healthy child. It helps me putting into perspective what really matters  and what  I should just let it go: what battles with Miss B are worth fighting for in the quest of raising a little girl. And further, her postings inspire me to be a stronger,a more resilient and compassionate human being because if Claudia's mom and Claudia are invencible I can be too! So, at the end of the day, the feeling is bitter-sweet.

For the first time today since the day I began following this page, I read a negative posting from Claudia's mom. A posting of a mom who is angry at the world for allowing her daughter to be victim of a terrible disesase. A mom who is tired of fighting a battle, she has always dreamed  she could win, but in reality knows she is going to lose. It seems as if she is almost coming to terms with Claudia's departure as she is now seeing her daughter suffer. And that took me to the day I heard my mom for the first time wishing her beloved Dad and my Granpa would leave us so that he could be pain free.

The only thing we can  possibly do  to comfort Claudia's mom is encourage her because she has been encouraging all of the 180k followers throughout this journey. Blessings Momma, hoping for an end free of pain for Claudia and peace in your heart to accept what was in store for your daughter and family. For reasons we don't yet understand, you were blessed and chosen. "I can do all this through Him who gives me strength." Peace...

When She Grows Up…

 

 

When we are pregnant, we can’t wait till the baby is out. We need to learn if it’s a boy or a girl. Once we know that, we need to know what the baby is like. We were caught in the 4D trap. We did one of those 4D ultrasounds that told us very little of our baby girl because she decided to nap behind the placenta. Then , by looking at her in these ultrasounds we kept imagining what her personality would be like. ‘Oh, if she’s hiding, she will be shy’. Or: ‘She will surely be a quiet kid as she doesn’t move too much in my belly’!  None of these predictions turned out to be true. My girl has always been a social butterfly that could never be still for very long. The only truth out of the 4D and the many ultrasounds was that the baby would come with a lot of hair. And that she did.

 
Once the baby is out, the anxiety about the future does not cease, it ever grows.

We further speculated what the color or her eyes and hair would be. Nothing could prepare me to have a blond girl with hazel eyes! A blond girl, really? So not me!!! She was born with dark brown hair and bright blue eyes and that remained true until she was about 9 months.

 Then we start imagining what her personality would be like and who she would look alike. She looks a lot like her daddy but has my eye expression and eyebrows and curly hair. She’s stubborn, clumsy, argumentative, romantic and a people-pleaser like mommy; extrovert, confident, athletic and moody like papaya and competitive and determined like both.

As she started school we began to imagine what sort of profession she would have.

When she was very young, she used to say that when she grew up she wanted to be a mermaid. She quickly changed to cowgirl and stuck with cowgirl almost until her Kindergarten graduation when she changed to doctor. Most recently, she has been saying she wants to be a Scientist.

 

This week was her first week back to school. Miss B is now a First Grader! She’s so proud and as well she should! Miss B has grown so much this past year! She knows how to tie her shoes, she knows how to log on to her computer and play her games, she reads most words, she can tell the time,  on regular watches, count her money and her math skills are amazing. She loves to learn and to use new words and takes us by surprise when she decides to explain the definition of “oasis”, “hieroglyphs” or use “in fact” or “actually” correctly.  She says she prefers her reading and writing classes and she loves reading, but I think she really is great at Math and Science. During Summer, whenever she saw a board she would write math sentences. She awed us last week by multiplying with her fingers as high as 7x7 and that was not memorized. When she got 8x8 wrong because she answered 62, she almost had a fit for making a mistake. She knows all about moon phases, the moon itself, coral reefs, night, day and gravity. The instructor at MOSI said that she was a “bright young lady” and that had taught the instructor herself some stuff during Science camp.

I am not concerned what profession she chooses as long as it is legal, right? I am not raising an olympian or a model or a scientist. I am raising a little girl to be fierce, determined, fair, honest, compassionate and confident. I want her to forget the fact that she’s a daughter of immigrants and a female. I want her to succeed believing she’s all she wants to be and nothing can stop her but herself. In sum, I want her to be successful and, most importantly, happy with the choice she’s made and proud of her heritage and her accomplishments.

 Similarly to what happened last year,  this first week of school left me a bit nostalgic. As I blogged a year before, can we stop having days and years? I do not want to see her grow!!!

She already told me the first day of school this year that she didn’t need me to take her to school. That she could very well take the bus to school on her  own from the very first day. Of course I wouldn’t let her. Of course I wanted to hold her hand while she lets me on the way to her class and take a bunch of pictures without her feeling embarrassed about it. I wanted to hand her to the teacher as the most precious treasure she really is to us. So I am holding on to all of that as long as I can!

Thinking about the day she was born and everything that has happened so far is a way of holding on I guess…

 

 

 

O Que Realmente Importa

Vi esse post no Facebook de uma amiga e amay como dizem as meninas. Dei um Google na autora Cinthia Moralles e achei um blog maravilhoso: Maenual de Instrucoes.

Fiquei feliz em constatar que estou vivendo o agora  porque faco 99% dessa lista (confesso que no momento relevar birras tem sido o problema!!!) ate porque sempre pensei dessa forma! Aproveitando cada minuto! Carpe Diem!

Compartilhando finalmente um blog post em Portugues!

terça-feira, 23 de outubro de 2012

O que realmente importa...

Tudo vai passar.
Eles vão crescer e vão dispensar nosso colo.
Vai chegar a fase em que os amigos serão mais importantes que os pais.
Que nossas demonstrações de afeto em público serão consideradas um grande "mico".
Que em vez de torcermos para que eles durmam, torceremos para que cheguem logo em casa.
Que não se interessarão mais pelos velhos brinquedos.
Que o alvoroço na hora do almoço vai dar lugar a calmaria.
Que os programas em familia serão menos atrativos que os churrascos com a turma.
Que dirão coisas tão maduras que nosso coração irá se apertar.
Que começaremos a rezar com muito mais frequência.
Que morreremos de saudade dos nossos bebês crescidos.
Por isso...

Viva o agora.

Releve as birras.

Conte até 10.

Faça cosquinhas.

Conte histórias.

De abraços de urso.

Deite ao lado deles na cama.

Abrace-os quando tiverem medos.

Beije os machucados (sim beijo de mãe cura de verdade).

Solte pipas.

Brinque de boneca.

Faça gols.

Comemorem.

Divirtam-se.

Acordem cedo nos domingos para aproveitar mais o dia.

Rezem juntos.

Estimule-os a cultivar amizades.

Faça bolos.

Carregue-os no colo.

Faça com que saibam o quanto são amados.

Passem o máximo de tempo possível juntos...

Assim, quando eles decidirem partir para seus próprios vôos, você ainda terá tudo isso guardado no coração.

Mr. Mom, Mr. Papaya & CNN

New Father, Old Values

This is my first and only child, a blessing every second. Even though there is a strong physical resemblance between us, it is undeniable the personality traits she gracefully inherited from her mom. Being a father these days is more than just taking you child on your lap, but more and more a team effort. It requires strong family values as a base, as well, the openness to keep up with the constant process of changes that we experience (Technology, Social Media, Society, etc.). As a father to my little Princess, I couldn't have asked God for a better role than to be the father that I am, to the daughter that I have and the wife to complete us.

http://www.cnn.com/2013/07/24/living/parents-no-more-mr-mom/index.html?hpt=li_t4

Mid July I (@beachmom01) found out about the CNN iReport assignment asking to write how the role of fathers had evolved these days via Twitter. Since I had a great picture of Carlos and Bianca in her pink barbie tent taken earlier in the year, I RT'd in Twitter suggesting that Carlos (@akacarioca) wrote and he agreed to it!

Right after @akacarioca posted on CNN, CNN iReport replied to my RT asking if the picture @akacarioca had used was the one I had suggested and upon my reply they tweeted saying that they  had "loved, loved, loved it". I knew we had done well then. Later that day,  CNN vetted our report and contacted Carlos to ask further questions on the wonderful piece he had written.

Wednesday, July 24th 2013 last week, our story was included as one of the 9 stories in an article named "Prince William and dads everywhere show 'Mr. Mom' is outdated" that was the cover of CNN Living tab of the main CNN site. WOW! Something that started so simple as a tribute from Papaya to his Nenenha Caribenha to put on this blog was published by freaking CNN on their main site! Amazing feeling... So proud of our team work and even more of hubby, no exactly a Mr. Mom, but a fun Daddy that does not mind playing tea parties, putting pink fairy hats on, being silly  and who loves his little girl ever so deeply.

I <3 akacarioca="" br="">

Powerless

 

I had always thought it was cheesy when people said that your views change once you have a child. I’ve always wanted to be this totally cool mom (whatever that means…). The events of this week have proven me wrong once again. How can I really ignore that I am a mom and remain unaffected?

Had I not been a mom would it possibly pass just like another week with bad news and good news to be digested via Twitter? Maybe. But the result of the Zimmerman trial coupled with the death of the lead actor from Glee Cory Monteith affected me greatly.

It was easy to digest Amy Winehouse’s death. Not that anyone deserves to die from overdose, but I already had this image of this uncontrollable and tortured rockstar that would be prone to that. So no surprise. However, with Cory Monteith was different. While I knew he had been in rehab, it is a consensus he was a good kid with a drug problem. That message hit home real fast. Of course, he had a troubled upbringing, of course it proves to us once and once again that your childhood can shape who we will become and that places a burden in every parent. However, what this story really told me is how powerless addicts are. It is not a battle of will or a matter of self-control, it’s a condition. It is difficult to explain how a kid that has a loving girlfriend, friends, family (again not that adjusted) a show that is doing well, fame and money still needs to recur to drugs for his comfort? Because it is not a matter of wanting it or not, it is a disease. For me what really is scary about this is knowing that your kid that has always been adjusted (not his case though) can one day turn to drugs for curiosity or to fit in and end up a drug addict with no free will. To that end, in thesis, Cory could be anyone’s kid!

The result of the Zimmerman trial gave rise to the same powerless feeling. Trayvon Martin could be your kid walking down the street with a bag of skittles when a vigilante profiles him and decides he is dangerous and goes after him. I am not going into the debate here around gun control and racial profiling, etc. I have very clear views on that and in my book George Zimmerman is guilty of starting a chain of events that led to death. Nevertheless,  this is not what I want to talk about. What I want to highlight is how fragile life is. And how sometimes there is absolutely nothing a parent can do to protect his/her kids.

In the end, it boils down to: how can I ensure my daughter is safe? How can I ensure I give her all she needs, that I’m always her safe harbor so that she will never ever have to resort to a crazy trip of drugs to feel happy, loved and safe? How can I ensure she is not fruit of a huge injustice? I know that a happy childhood helps greatly, but it is certainly not enough. And because of the realization that I don’t have all the answers and that the future is uncertain and uncontrollable, this became a gloomy and dim week for me as a mom.

Proud Momma

Angel from the Moving Up Ceremony committee asked me if Miss B would speak a few words of thank you to Ms. Kupcik during the ceremony. In knowing her well, I already knew the answer. But still deferred to Ms. B. herself that obviously said she would do it.

When she came home after the rehearsal, I asked her if she knew what she was going to say. I wanted to make sure it was all proper. She said she knew and told me. Her mini-speech was pretty decent. The day of the Moving Up ceremony while we were driving to the ceremony, I asked her again just to make sure and she again with determination told me what she was going to say.

When the time of the ceremony came, she was there ready to speak with no hesitation, no memorized line and all the confidence in the world. Nothing could make me prouder. My own baby girl! I was in tears... as usual...

My Little Mermaid

I was noticing that Bianca was getting a little bored with her swimming classes, since they are only 30 minutes, the pool is small and there are not really a lot of challenges. The kids rarely race each other, but only learn the styles.

I did my research and came up with an idea and asked her opinion. I told her that would be a new place for her to swim where she could learn more and that she would be able to compete for medals. The competition was enough to get her sold on the idea, in spite of the unknown factor for her. She agreed and we went to the tryout for the LOL Lightning Team last Monday.

When I arrived in there,  I saw a tone of kids mostly her age or a little older. The instructor called each kid and asked them to swim free style and backstroke in this huge pool. I got a little nervous because of the size of the pool but thought she could do it. I just asked her to swim close to the edge (in case she got tired) and do what she had already learned at Seal Swim and try her best.

As I saw the kids in front of her, I breathed a sigh of relief. With the exception of one kid, the poor kids could barely float, let alone execute the styles. When it was Bianca's turn, the instructor kept asking where she had learned how to swim and what a great job they had done. I knew she had killed it.

Yesterday in the morning we got an email confirming that she had made the team and could start this coming week, hooray!! I was so proud for her!

The "recommended" schedule for kids her age is grueling. It includes pratices 4 times a week, 45 min each day. It is no wonder why this country outperforms all others in the Olympic Games.

As excited as I am, I do not plan to put Bianca through this schedule, unless she decides she really wants to dedicate herself to swimming. I had high ideals of becoming an athlete  while growing up. While I would never  impose my dreams onto her, today I am  even less tempted to do so. I am very realistic of what it takes to get there. A life of sacrifice, little playtime and rare glory. Sacrificing her playtime, her teenage years is something she should only do for something else she is very passionate about. And if it ever comes to that, this decision will solely be hers. In any case, I will be there either cheering her on her social life or on the bleachers seeing her swim, play soccer or whatever it is that she wants to do.

Welcome to Fantasyland

If you ask me what was one of major disappointments I've had in my life I can quickly come up with two: 1) when I discovered that the singers did not necessarily write the lyrics to their songs, 2) when I along with my sister found out that Santa Claus was not real. I was six then.

I don’t remember ever getting mad at my parents for fooling us, probably a little hurt after realizing that some of friends already knew.After passed the initial shock, I was actually sorry I had found out,  for Christmas lost all of its magic (Sorry Jesus!). For now, it is easy with Miss B because she believes in everything!  Last month, when I asked her what she wanted to her birthday so that I could tell Fischer's  and Cooper’s mom, she told me that she wanted pixie dust to make her fly like Tinker Bell. I just found that so magical!

The world out there can be cruel and mean, but I treasure the innocence and the magical world children live in and I feed from it.. We  deliberately chose to delay the entrance of our little girl into the real world by being part of her world ourselves. We all believe in Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy, Easter Rabbit etc. We put her to speak to Santa on the phone, we write letters to Santa, we leave cookies for Santa to eat and food on the grass for the reindeer , carrots to the Easter Bunny and we leave teeth to the Tooth Fairy. 

(Calling Santa and asking for Jelly Beans - 2010 Christmas)

Tonight was another night that I spent crafting her gift from the Tooth Fairy as her second tooth came off. It is so priceless to see her joy and excitement, that I want to hang on to this fantasyland as long as I  possibly can.

Letter to Santa (2012), receiving basket from Easter Bunny (2011) and then Tooth Fairy visit #1 (October 2012) and #2.( February 2013)

As Papaya always says, it is not true to say that Santa Claus does not exist. He may not be here in flesh and blood, but he does exist. so long as we believe in  him. He is in every one of us. And so are fairies, Easter bunnies etc.

So excited with her Scooter that she looked up (as if looking to the sky) and screamed: "Thank you, Santa!"(2011 Christmas)

If I were a President...

Miss B asked me if I knew that Obama was the 44th president. She then went on to tell me that George Washington was the first president and asked me "which number" Abraham Lincoln was. I guess I will have to study some US History. As a President, she said she would build a castle. No expenditure cuts on her term I guess. Happy President's Day!

Bloco Bianca - Ano VI

Bianca aos 6 anos eh so simpatia. Mas como toda menina de 6 anos, eh muito dramatica, romantica ate, eu diria,  e adora um floreado.  

Mas nem tudo sao flores, ela consegue ser manipuladora, muito teimosa e tem um argumento pronto na ponta da lingua ("but mommy!").  Tudo bem sao bons tracos para a vida adulta. O lado bom eh que ela eh uma otima negociadora! 

Ela adora esportes e o problema eh que gosta de tudo! Ela fez ginastica olimpica, futebol e natacao  nesse ano e consegue se da bem em todos, nao so porque ela eh forte fisicamente (apesar de ser fininha), mas tambem eh extramemente competitiva. 


Outra faceta dessa figurinha eh que ela eh uma 'people-pleaser'. Ela adora elogiar se gosta da sua roupa. Incrivel como ja aprendem a ser meninas dessa idade!!! Sim, fora o aspecto que ela continua a ser a perua-mor, adora colares, pulseiras, coisas coloridas e brilhantes. Nunca vi mais perua!

Depois que entrou no Kindergarten ela aprendeu muito. Le livrinhos sozinha e, apesar de dizer que as aulas de leitura sao as suas favoritas, ela se da melhor em matematica. Ela adiciona, diminui e multiplica com muita facilidade. Um dos passamento favoritos dela eh fazer sentencas de matematica e brincar de word search. Toda professora fala que ela eh muito criativa e, de fato, ela inventa estorias fantasticas. Ela tambem eh muito minunciosa e detalhista, querendo que saia tudo perfeitinho, as vezes demora mais do que deve nas suas tarefas.

Abaixo segue as listas dos Faves dela:
Cor Favorita: Rosa, prata e todas so arco-iris.
Comida/Bebida Favorita: Pepperoni pizza,  arroz, sushi, burritos, crackers, cookies e cupcakes, agua de coco e leite.  Adora melancia, cereja e pepino.
Desenho Favorito: Princess Sofia, Doctor McStuffins
BFFs: Emily, Cecilia e Lilie.
Brinquedo favorito: Seu bichinho de pelucia o Charlie e o meu Iphone.
Programa favorito: ir ao cinema, , nadar na piscina, brincar com seus amigos, ir pra parque de diversao (adora a space moutain and laser tag) e ir sair pra jantar fora (yummy-yummy party) .
Música favorita: Firework (Katy Perry), todas da Princess Sofia e jazz (diz ela!)
O que quer ser quando crescer: "A cowgirl"
Nao gosta: de dormir cedo, de fogo, de tomate, pasta (so de mac'n cheese)

My Baby Can Read?

I had told Miss B that on January 21st she would not go to school. I never really cared to explain why or said anything about MLK. I just assumed she would neither care nor understand the relevance anyway. I was so wrong.

On Friday, prior to the holiday she came home and said to me she wasn’t going to school on Monday. I mentioned to her that I had already told her about it, but then she went on to say: “We won’t have classes because it’s Martin Luther King Jr’s Day! He changed bad laws so that black and white people could ride the bus together, attend the same schools and sit in the same restaurants.” I was in awe!

Similarly to the MLK explanation, I have come across with innumerous situations in which she clearly explains some concepts I assumed she would not have the faintiest idea about it. The other day,  she decided to give me a Science lecture on gravity (“it’s the force that pull us down to the floor” she defined). Hubby and I even kid around that she is Wikipedia because she loves to voluntarily provide definitions. Another day, she explained to me why we have parts of the world that are night while others which are day time and how the earth revolves around the sun and why the moon would shine.

I swear I don’t remember knowing all that as a 5-year old…

Before you all think I am trying to make a case that my daughter is a prodigy, I am guaranteeing you I am not. I am actually trying to make a bigger point. So I will give you one more example that is not related with Miss B. I went to speak to her class about Banking as part of the Career Day activities. I put together a ppt explaining the route of the money followed since we deposited and then eventually got money out of the ATM. When I asked the class if anyone in the class knew that money walked, this little girl amazed me with a perfect adult-like explanation about the way money moved around, something I had never spoken to my daughter, the daughter of a Banker (or Baker, or so she thinks!). Man, I felt guilty!

The conclusion I come to is that we highly underestimate the potential of our kids have and how much they can grasp provided that you take the time to explain how the world functions. We are the best teachers they can have!!!

I even go further to pounder about a highly controversial topic: the many programs that teach babies how to read. Are we forcing them to do something out of their leagues and putting pressure on them unnecessarily so early on (It’s true some moms just do it to fuel their pride)? Or they can actually handle and we just assume they can’t? Sorry, I do not have the answer, but the more I observe how much and how fast they can learn, I would not doubt that babies are capable of learning how to read effortlessly!

I didn’t write my New Year resolutions anywhere (maybe I should do on another topic, is it too late in the year?), but this certainly goes to the top of my list: #1 – Take the time to teach your kid how the world works and be patient to address the many questions she may have (after all she is always questioning everything!).

P.S - Update from February:

Right before President's name she aske me if I knew that Barack Obama was the 44th President. She then continued to tell me that George Washington was the first and asked me if I knew "which number" was Abraham Lincoln. Oh boy, I guess, I will have to do my homework and go back to studying US History!

If Life is Soccer...

The Soccer Season started as usual. Known and unknown faces,  bright players and other players trying soccer for the first time, not really sure what they were doing and whether they wanted to play. But they were a team and had a nice coach, good kids and even a website (done by yours truly!).

The Tornadoes

From the start, it was obvious that the Green and the Yellow teams were the top contenders. We won games easily against the Blue team, but lost to the Yellow team and tied with the Green Team.

All I wished for the season was for Bianca to have fun, to learn some and play with her BFF Emily, since they are going to different schools now. 

However, this season turned out to be much more than just that. It gave me a hint what kind of person Bianca is becoming and  I am so very proud of her.

Bianca was never the top scorer. #6 was. #6 was a physical player, a gifted athlete I’m sure but  with one downfall: he likes the ball! Too much sometimes, as it became evident in the finals.

We played the first final against the Yellow Team to whom we had lost before. Whoever won the game would play against the winner of the Green vs. Blue Team. We all knew it would be the Green team. In all sincerity, I was expecting the Tornadoes to lose. As I said, my expectations for this championship were not high result-wise. I was happy, as long as they didn’t finish in last! 

Emily celebrating her goal in a very difficult game.

On the ride to the soccer field, I knew she was pumped by the way she was singing her songs. I talked to her too, that this was the final, that she had to give everything if she wanted the gold medal but she would still get a medal even if they lost, but the gold medal was only for the winners. I also told her that at the end of the day, what mattered the most was to be able to say that she  had tried her best. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose and it’s ok to lose but of course it feels better to win (Hello Yo Gabba, Gabba!). Apparently, our prep talk combined with her fierce spirit that morning helped, she opened the score.  We scored a second. I was cautiously optimistic. All of the sudden,  the Yellow Team scored 3 and that would determine how the game would be – very tight! The game was tough and very nervous and for us,  parents,  even more. I was relieved no one understood my curses in Portuguese!

We had a personal offenses from both teams, we had own goals.  I even played coach and asked the coach not to take the two top scorers all at once from the team when we were down by 3 goals. We had Emily leaving because the other team player  kicked her on the leg, Bianca left crying because her own team mate pushed her and she fell. We talked, she came back and scored as she did previously in the season. And the game ended 5 -5. We needed our best players on the field. Only that the best of the best wanted to win so much, that he would take the ball from his own team mates and would not score.  All of the sudden, #6  who had been the top scorer of our team was also the downfall of the team.  He finally did  score to my personal relief, as other parents were pretty mad at him too. And the Tornadoes would play against the Green for the trophy. Phew…

Miss B celebrating the tight victory over the Yellow Team

That Green team had 2 girls that were at least 7, judging by their size. They are mean girls that push around and say mean things, I very well remembered from the past game. I would rather lose to the Yellow team than having to lose to them. 

The much bigger and mean girls that ended up not being a threat after all!

 The final match was actually a walk in the park. Bianca scored again a couple of times and defended to perfection. End of game: Tornadoes 5 vs. 2 Green. The mean girls lost. Life is fair for once!!! The Tornadoes and parents were on cloud 9!

Miss B scoring one of her goals.

Celebrating the Championship title.

Girlie Power!

Physique and natural talent some times are just not enough. Olympians are much more than that. They are talented, they have great physique but they are also required to have a team spirit, to be determined and focused and not to crack under pressure.

It is not only about talent and physique, but about the attitude! Miss B and her "game face".

 If the tale of the finals is any indication of how life as a battle that it is will be fought by Bianca, I am relieved to see a little girl that is focused, a fighter and hustler that never gives up and plays her best when pressured.  Bianca, my Miss B, perulitinha was not the top scorer of the game I don’t think, but she made it happen that day. She was the MVP who defended mercilessly and scored more than all of her previous games combined. She was the MPV that day but she is my MVP every day.

My Golden Girl, my forever MVP

The Day is finally here!

First day riding on the bus to school like a big girl!

I imagined this day would be so painful... I imagined I would be crying my eyes out behind my sunglasses whereas she would be going to the bus with a smile on her face. It was not exactly like that today.I was at peace.

She was excited and a little afraid after getting on the bus, but she managed to let go of my hand and walked bravely towards the seat she had been assigned next to other Kindergartners. Part of me being calm had to do with the fact that beyond the bus ride, the symbolism of her leaving us to walk on her own feet had already been lost as she started school last week. The first day, we walked with her holding her hand. We met her teacher Ms. Bridgens and we left her as happy as one can be. The second day Carlos dropped her off  at the door and someone from school escorted her to her classroom. Now she says she actually does not need anyone to walk her in. She can do it, because she is a big girl!  On top of this, I have been able to communicate with the Ms. Bridgens, her teacher, almost on a daily basis and Bianca has come home happy about school and adores her Teacher.

Ms. Bridgens and Miss B so excited to show her the mirror she was carrying!

But it was not only that.

In the truth, I started to prepare myself for this day, the day she started VPK . And that process actually culminated with the week she finally graduated.

In the graduation ceremony she was so very happy that I actually managed to control myself and only wept a little bit as the principal  of Primrose opened the ceremony. The rest of the ceremony turned out to be a blast. It was so gratifying to see her so happy and so confident dancing and singing from the top of her lungs on that stage and making her thumbs up sign after each song much to the delight of the audience and,of course, to ours  - her very proud parents. The night ended sweetly with her thanking me for the flowers we had bought her as we walked back to the car.

Happy as happy can be!

Dancing Away!

Giving her thumbs up!



She was so happy to receive her diploma from Mr. Chonaswksi



That entire week  outside of the ceremony, however, was so hard. It was very painful to see her give hugs and say her goodbyes to her beloved teacher Ms. Kuhn and her friends who would be going to different Summer camps.



Saying her goodbyes to Ms. Kuhn



All of that emotion came out all at once as I watched the video Ms. Kuhn had put together. One of the moms had already mentioned how special it was, but I was still not prepared to what I was about to see. Beyond the pictures shown since she joined Primrose at. 2.5 years old and the soft background music, precious moments of her life started playing on my head. The day she was born so tiny and pink. The day I first fed her with solid food and she crashed on the high chair. The day she took her first steps to our neighbor Christina at Christmas day. The reports I received complaining she had bitten kids that were in her way. The day we celebrated her first birthday with a big bash. The day she jumped off her crib and we only heard her when she was by our bed. Her joy after scoring goals at soccer. Her angelic voice singing Happy Birthday Jesus solo. The first time I realized she could read some words. Her first playdate on her own with Emily. And the images go on and on!

It was a lot to take in and I was sobbing even after the video was over. In that moment, I think I let it all go and was at peace with her going to go to Kindergarten and riding on the bus… on her own...

In the end, however, what wiped away all negative feelings was to see a  huge smile on her face today as she got out of the bus to come home and to later hear her say later during the day and in her thankful prayers at bedtime: “Mommy, I’m really happy I got to ride the bus today!”

Getting off the bus!